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The following items have been reproduced with the original punctuation (or lack thereof) and the original use or misuse of uppercase characters.
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 'Innocent persons not found guilty' -Government Analyst
by Shanika Sriyananda Liyanage (Sunday Observer 12-1-2003)
K. Sivaraja, Government Analyst, referring to our article 'Forensic Blunders' which appeared in last week's Sunday Observer said that no innocent person has been found guilty of rape and murder.
 
Someone at the Sunday Times has got a lisp! "We With Our Readers..." With? Best Withes?
Sunday Times 12-1-2003
{short description of image} Felled tree kills him
By D.W. Wijayapala (Daily News 23 Sept 2002)

Judicial Medical officer Rohan Ruwanpura who conducted the post mortem returned a verdict of death due to serious injuries in the brain caused as a result of the tree he was cutting falling on him.

{short description of image} Laws to curb belching soon
by Florence Wickramage(Daily News 11-09-2002)
Regulations with new revised vehicle emission standards to protect the environment....(Farting still allowed? - Ed)

Spotters: Vinod Moonesinghe and Ranil Bibile
{short description of image} Dean on the students' apology
(Daily News 13th Sept 2002)
Thirteen out of the 20 Ruhuna students who were found guilty for indiscipline have apologised in writing from the Dean of the Faculty of Medicine Prof. Susarith Mendis on Tuesday, The dean said issuing a press release. (Who is guilty here? - Ed)
{short description of image} Glittering Colombo City by night
(Sunday Observer 8-9-2002)
Heightened prospects for peace and a growing world focus on international events here have spurned Colombo's Municipal authorities to introduce more sparkle into a metropolitic long affected by war and economic doldrums.

Mayor Gunawardene told the 'Sunday Observer' that the country's economy could be developed by doing business at night.
"With the Colombo City sprining into a new life in the night we could see people getting into action...."
Spotter: Vinod Moonesinghe

{short description of image} CID wants more time to probe ladies' handbag
by Sarath Malalasekera (Daily News 29th August 2002)
{short description of image} Death of IGP Lucky Kodituwakku

By Norman Palihawadana (The Island 29th August 2002)
Acting Inspector General of Police, T. E. Anandarajah said "Late Inspector General of Police, Lucky Kodituwakku took a personnel (sic!) (Shouldn't that be "personal", Norman? - Ed) interest in the problems of senior and junior officers of the police. He was a person with a good heart". (He probably died of a heart attack! - Ed)

Explosives items like hand grenades and bombs are being sent to the Governments Analyst's Department by various Magistrate Court's in the country, but such items were not deloused before hand. The Sunday Observers comment on the unfortunate death of a Forensic Scientist killed by a hand grenade submitted for examination
Surely, shome mistake!
{short description of image} Handwriting collaborated with that of suspect, says DSG
Headline in The Island of 28th Sept
(Contributed by Vinod Moonesinghe)
A Knew Son Over The Horison
The Island 27th Aug AMBALANTOTA - A new horison (sic) has dawned at Kudawella with the setting up of the new fishery harbour. It was built at a cost of Rs. 316 millions. The length office breakwater is 680 meters, length office quay wall is 200 meters. The berthing capacity is 150 boats...(Apart from the obvious spelling brick, in our experience horizons don't actually dawn! - Ed)
(Contributed by Vinod Moonesinghe)
Play a minor chord when ascending the gallows...
Two sentenced to death in teenage double murder by Kumar Wethasinghe
Daily News (on line) 21Aug 2001
Since the case was based purely on circumstantial evidence, it is not like a case where evidence is not like the links of a chain in which even if one link gave way the chain collapses. But the instant case is more like a case of a rope comprised of several chords (sic). One strand of the rope might be insufficient to sustain the weight. But three stranded together may be quite sufficient in strength. (Playing a minor chord such as Am is ideal when handing out a death sentence! The learned judge's reference to rope is also interesting considering that the death sentence in the old Rep is carried out by means of hanging - Ed)
MUMMY, DEAREST.
Srilankan TV personality Sumana Nellampitiya interviewed by a London based journalist Tilak Fernando for Newslanka 16th August 2001
Q. What made you seek a career in the Radio as an announcer rather than pursuing your studies to University level.....
A.I did not have adequate marks to qualify for University entrance.
After sitting two exam papers my mother expired and it affected my exam and the university education altogether.

(It is a tough life being a mother - Ed)
Avoid this hospital!
Sunday Observer 29th July 2001
The 13 bodies are lying at the Ragama mortuary hospital and steps would be taken to hand over them to the ICRC.

grabrrmskfltyhg or New Police Division
Two airmen to be questioned
By Norman Palihawadane (The Island 27th July 2001)
The two airmen on duty on July 23 at Negombo, Kurana Raj Fernando playground are to be produced before an Air Force court for neglect of duty.... (story continues-Ed)..... Meanwhile three other buses similar to the bus taken into custody in Kotahena area in which the Tiger terrorists said to have arrived had been taken into custody from Minuwangoda, Morawila and Colombo Fort and four Tamils employed in these buses arrested,ukoljuhgmnh8jftkokjiuhylkijuhb police sources said.
Contributed by Vinod Moonesinghe
Come again?!
Gem dealer killed in hotel room
(Newslanka, July 12, 2001)
...Police also have received information that the Gems found with the suspect who was running away were belonged various persons from whom the deceased had collected to be sold.
Say that again?!!??
Brothers drown in reservoir
(Newslanka, July 12, 2001)
Two schoolboys aged 15 and 13 years of the same family went to Maluwarala reservoir in Thalahagama for a bath, on their back to home from the temple after participating in a Sil Campaign with one of their friends were drowned in the reservoir.
COPS SHOOT SENIOR COP?
(The Sunday Leader 22nd July 2001)
In a separate incident, another individual was shot dead at Peliyagoda on the same day. Named Achintha and a resident of Warakapola, SSP Rienzie Perera told The Sunday Leader he too had been shot dead by the cops.

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