VOLUME 20 {short description of image} SCN SRILANKA CRAZY NEWS
SCN: WE WEED OUT THE SERIOUS NEWS! {short description of image}INDEX

SCN, Srilanka Crazy News and the slogan "We weed out the serious news" are trademarks of the SCN/ MadPage/ McMaluPaan Corp.

CAT FIGHT
{short description of image} Sri Lanka sprinter blocks movie about her life
COLOMBO (Reuters) 20 Oct 2001- Sprinter Susanthika Jayasinghe, who gave Sri Lanka its first Olympic medal in 50 years in Sydney last year, obtained a court order on Friday blocking the production of a movie about her life. "I am an international star. I don't think anyone can play Susanthika especially while I am alive," (Whoops! - Ed) Jayasinghe told Reuters after the Colombo District Court ordered a temporary halt to the shooting of "Suseema". Jayasinghe was particularly critical of Sangeetha Weeraratne, the buxom Sinhalese actress chosen to portray her. "She may be a lot sexier than I am but she doesn't have my muscles," she said. "She can't match my quick tongue, nor can she run like me." (We are sure that aforementioned buxom Miss Weeraratne, the actress is nice to look at and must excell in other aspects of life other than muscles, quick tongue etc. Since this is a family newspaper we will say no more! - Ed)
Anti-Green Party
{short description of image} Ex- PA MP runs riot
(The Island 19 Oct 2001)
An ex-PA Member of parliament, had stormed the Puttalam town, in several vehicles with his goondas and weapons, had threatened the shop-keepers and the people, threatening to cause bodily harm and damages to shops and sales-outlets if they would sell papers and polythene rolls in Green colour. He had forcibly entered shops and taken away large number of polythene rolls — even, green bags — and warned them not to sell such Green colour materials. He had then gone round the area pulling down all decorations done in Green, ex-UNP MP A. H. M. Azwer said.(Green is the colour of the opposition United National Party. It is to be hoped that this individual won't resort to Agent Orange to destroy all vegetation! - Ed)
Kill the cat!
{short description of image} Daily News 19 Oct 2001 (letter)
My Gun I have a little gun
I shoot it every day
My pus*y is a tiger
With coat of orange grey
I creep up slowly behind her
On tippy toes, I tread
Bang! goes my little gun
And pus*y falls down dead
This poem ... read Read this poem, one out of a dozen poems given to five-year-old upper montessori children in a leading private school to learn. Ironically it is the only poem which the little ones have been asked to learn whatever it means. magine the mentality or the cultural background of the teacher who teaches these poems.
No wonder that terrorism today is not an act of the underprivileged or the uneducated but, one financed, fostered and blessed by the very wealthy, very influential and the very educated.
(Sorry we had to edit out the word pus*y as search engines find it offensive. - Ed)
Jake The Peg
{short description of image} Mine-injured elephant to get false foot
(Ananova) Story filed: 14:42 Tuesday 16th October 2001.
An elephant which lost a foot after stepping on a landmine is being given a false one. A German prosthetic limb designer is to give Same her first fitting in Sri Lanka next month. She was wounded almost two years ago and had been fitted with a crude replacement. Specialist Manfred Herwig is working on the project with local vets. He was told about nine-year-old Same by his colleague Anette Walter Kilian who saw her during a visit to an elephant orphanage. Mr Herwig says it was an unusual request but he is happy to do it, adding: "At first I thought it must be a joke." He is putting the finishing touches to the foot which has to carry Same's two and a half tonne frame.
Sad News
{short description of image} Asia’s oldest beer factory is closed down
Oct 02, 2001 Nuwara Eliya: Asia’s oldest beer factory (Shouldn't that be "brewery"? - Ed) in Nuwara Eliya was closed down last week by Ceylon Brewery Limited (CBL). Build in 1881, the Lion beer factory in Nuwara Eliya has ceased production of its authentic Sri Lankan brand name ‘Lion Beer’ from last week because of high production cost, a company official told ColomboPage.
No more pocket money!
{short description of image} Son planned to collect ransom from father
ColomboPage News Desk, Sri Lanka Oct 17, Colombo: A businessman in Kegalle was shocked to hear that his son studying in grade 11 had been kidnapped and Rs. 200,000 was demanded to release him alive. Not knowing what to do, he contacted the Kegalle police and they soon traced the place from where the telephone call was made. Within hours the police arrested the son and his schoolmate, who had given the call demanding the ransom.

{short description of image}Back to the top of page

Free JavaScripts provided
by
The JavaScript Source