VOLUME 33 {short description of image} SCN SRILANKA CRAZY NEWS
SCN: WE WEED OUT THE SERIOUS NEWS! {short description of image}INDEX

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Unidentified suspects taken into custody but not arrested and in any case are they suspicious suspects?
{short description of image} Assailants kill businessman
(Daily News 18th May 2002)
Businessmen (sic-Ed) at Kegalle new market had been attacked by sharp weapons by some unidentified assailants on May 13. The incident had occurred about 9 p.m. when the business stalls were about to be closed for the day. One of the victims has succumbed to the very serious cut injuries all over his body on the spot itself.
The other victim who also sustained very severe injuries was removed to Kegalle Base Hospital where he is lying in a very critical state. Armed Police are guarding the entire area. None of the suspects has been identified so far, but two people have been taken into custody and remanded by the police, on suspicion. The incident is suspected to be a result of rivalry among the businessmen in the market itself. The Kegalle police are investigating to get at the root cause of this incident and to arrest the suspects. (Say that again! - Ed)(Spotter: Vinod Moonesinghe)
Forget hand grenades! Throw the buffaloes!
{short description of image} Users of vehicle without number plates use novel way to escape police
by Norman Palihawadane (The Island 18th May 2002)
A police team from Matugama gave chase to a vehicle without number plates proceeding along Kalawana road last Wednesday (15) night but was obstructed when two buffaloes with legs tied were pushed out of the vehicle without number plates on to the road, police Headquarters sources said.
The police team was on mobile patrol duty along Kalawana road when they observed that a vehicle without number plates was proceeding while shooting towards the police. (Clever of the police to notice this as a suspect vehicle! - Ed)
The mobile patrol gave chase to the vehicle without number plates. On the way two buffaloes with legs tied were pushed out of the vehicle without number plates which obstructed the mobile patrol from proceeding further. The vehicle without number plates got away scot free, the sources said.
(Spotter: Vinod Moonesinghe) Any news of the buffaloes? - Ed
Toilet Robbery!...or don't eat Waraka before going to the bank!
{short description of image} Heist at Slave Island bank (Daily News 8 May 2002)
Cash worth Rs. 2.8 million belonging to a multimillionaire money changer of Colombo Fort and another have been stolen by an unknown party at a Private Bank at Slave Island last evening. According to Slave Island police, the money changer accompanied by his assistant has gone to the Bank in his car taking with them foreign currency worth Rs. 1.8 million to be deposited and to be withdrawn in local currency.
The Money Changer after reaching the bank proximity remained in the car and sent his assistant to the bank to deposit the foreign exchange and gave him a further cheque for Rs. 1.8 million to obtain local currency to this value for the foreign currency deposited.
The assistant after depositing the foreign currency went to the local currency section to encash the cash cheque and on his way received a further cheque for Rs. 1 million alleged to be from a friend, all of which were encashed by collecting Rs. 2.8 million in cash.
On his way back within the bank, he is alleged to have developed a stomach upset and with the cash in his possession he has entered the bank toilet where he was said to have fallen unconscious. (Yes! We have heard of this ruse before! - Ed)
The money changer who was awaiting the Assistant's return got exited due to the inordinate delay and with the assistance of Bank security personnel made a search for his assistant. In their search they found the assistant lying fallen unconscious in the toilet and after some time when the assistant regained consciousness they found that the Rs. 2.8 million cash had disappeared. The money changer complained to the Slave Island Police about the incident. SSP, Colombo Central D. P. L. Dissanayake assisted by ASP Cyril Fernando and IP Bandutilleke, OIC Crimes are conducting investigations. (Spotter: Vinod Moonesinghe)
'OORAY!....'EAR! 'EAR!
{short description of image} Identity mistaken: Ear-piece taken (Daily Mirror 7th May 2002)
A Mike Tyson type ear-biting incident took place at Ratmalana yesterday with the alleged offender being not a boxer but an Electrical Engineer. The Assistant Engineer attached to the CEB's Kiribathgoda branch was driving his vehicle at Ratmalana when he was stopped by a police team led by a Sergeant. The police said they gave chase because the driver looked like a notorious criminal whom they had been hunting for. When the van was stopped and questions asked, the sergeant got a shock when the angry electrical man allegedly bit off a part of his ear. The sergeant was rushed to the police hosptal while the engineer was produced in court and later released on bail.(Spotter: Vinod Moonesinghe)

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