Top Military Brass Salute A Bit Of Fluff!
 "Dummy president" triggers protocol fiasco at Sri Lanka rehearsal
COLOMBO, Feb 3 (AFP) - Sri Lanka's
military top brass were red faced Monday after discovering that the "dummy
president" they saluted at independence day rehearsals here was a junior woman
constable, officials said.
For the
first time in decades, the military chiefs and the police inspector general
took part in the dress rehearsals for Tuesday's celebrations and only learnt of
their faux pas after the event, officials said.
"Usually it is the president's seniormost official who would be sent
for something like this," an official organising the celebrations said. "We
didn't know that the woman sent by the president's office was a constable from
her security unit."
"What can we do?
Her star(sic) must be good and she has a picture of a life time
showing service chiefs saluting her." |
Heil Chandrapala!
Top Military Brass Salute A Bit Of
Fluff!
"Her star(sic) must be good and she has a picture of a life time
showing service chiefs saluting
her".
|
Rancid Polecat Brings Country To A
Halt!
'Dead rat ' adjourns meeting
(The Island 24-1-2003)
Western Provincial Council sessions on Monday had to be limited to only a few
minutes due to the stench emanating from a dead rat inside the council chamber.
WPC Minister for Health and Council Affairs Nandana Mendis rising just after
the sessions commenced requested the chairman to adjourn since there was an
unbearable stench inside the chamber. Acting chairman A. M. Yusuf after
consulting other members adjourned the sessions. The council will meet again on
January 28. |
Drunk Bandaraniyke or
Katunayake?
Advisor's anatomy exposed [ColomboPage News Desk, Sri Lanka]
Jan 22, Colombo: The only brother and advisor of a VVIP was descending from a
plane at the airport named after his father when his pair of trousers came down
and rested on the ground.
He was
returning from his famous trip to the US. The man was in full spirits
(Corr: i.e. drunk as usual) and all attempts to
cover the lower part of his anatomy failed. Some security men rushed and helped
the man to cover his vital parts. He was dispatched home in a car hired by
them.
The advisor
was heard singing the famous baila "Me rate inna Minissu kelinne pissu" while
getting into the car. |
Rogues in robes!
Two ancient Buddha statues
recovered, monk arrested
[ColomboPage News Desk, Sri Lanka] Jan 21, Colombo: Two ancient
marble Buddha statues stolen from the Sri Pushparama Viharaya in Dodangoda,
Kalutara, were discovered in a Viharaya at Yatadolawatta, Matugama, by the
Dodangoda Police.
The two marble Buddha statues, which were stolen January
11th, had been received from Burma. Investigations were carried out on the
heels of a complaint made to the Police by the Chief Priest of the temple. The
bhikku in whose possession the two Buddha statues were found had told the
Police that the statues were found in the jungle on the temple premises. The
two
statues are
now in Police custody while Police continue to question
the bhikku. |
Sacred tooth?
Monk remanded for
selling elephant tusk
By Leary
Beekmeyer (Daily Mirror 20-01-2003)
Colombo Central Vice Squad yesterday, took into custody a Buddhist
priest belonging to a temple at Gintupitiya and another when he was about to
sell an elephant tusk to a Pettah businessman for Rs. 150,000/-. The priest was
in possession of a elephant tusk worth Rs. 500,000/- and upon interrogation by
the Vice Squad said that he had obtained the tusk from an
LTTE'r for Rs. 75,000/- when he lived in Trincomalee.
Both suspects were produced before the Colombo
Magistrate. They were remanded. |
I take this woman's hand to have and to
hold?
Hubby cuts woman's hand
(Daily News 20-1-2003)A man cut
a part of his wife's hand and escaped with it when she refused to go home with
him, Chilaw Police said.
H. M. Rasika
Damayanthi, 26, had left her husband and had been living with a relative at
Mugunuwatawana in Chilaw. The woman had refused her husband's demand to return
home.
He had then cut the woman's hand,
Police said. Damayanthi, admitted to Chilaw hospital was later transferred to
Colombo National Hospital. The suspect, an Army deserter, had been
earlier attached to the security staff of a former deputy Minister,
investigations revealed. |
They all wallow in
mud!
Lighter Vein: Mud bath leads to head chop?
[ColomboPage News Desk, Sri Lanka] Jan 16, Colombo: The sudden 48-hour
disruption to the water supply in the Greater Colombo area resulted in the
Minister in charge, Arumugam Thondaman, not having water for his bath.
Officials at the Water Board
dispatched a water bowser pronto to the Minister’s residence. The Minister
had reportedly been so eager to take a bath that he had not waited for the
stipulated period of 30 minutes for the sediment in the water to settle,
resulting in him literally having a mud bath.
The enraged Minister allegedly demanded the resignation of the Acting
Chairman of the Board, Tyronne Peiris. |
Arumugam Thondaman,
Minister |
He died happy!
Falls into kasippu cauldron and dies
By Gamini Mahagedera - Galle (Daily Mirror 14-1-2003)A
person who was boiling water in a pit to distill Kasippu fell into the
container and died due to injuries caused by burns. The victim is D. Ramyasiri
de Silva (40) of Kahawa, Uduwaragoda in the Ambalangoda police division. He was
a father of six children who lived on selling kasippu.
He fell into the pit at about 7.15 p.m. while working
at the Kasippu distilling location and was rushed to Balapitiya hospital with
serious injuries. Later he was transferred to Karapitiya hospital where he
died. Inquirer into Sudden Deaths N. J. Arambawela who conducted the inquest
recorded that the death was due to burns. Galle JMO D. D. Samaraweera conducted
the post mortem. |
They are all
nuts!
Hungarian tourist sent to Angoda mental
hospital by tour operators
Frederica Jansz in Colombo, 9 a.m. SLT Monday January 13 .
A Hungarian tourist, Dr. Katalin Nemes, who while on holiday in
Sri Lanka sought medical treatment for a spinal pain had been sent to the
Angoda Mental hospital instead.
That night her medical condition got
worse. Katalin complained of terrible pain in her spine as well as claimed she
suffered from high blood pressure. On Christmas day, Strassburger, took her to
the local private hospital in Negombo the "Ave Maria." She had been given heavy
sedatives and her memory is still not sure of the exact happenings at the
hospital and soon after.
Later she
remembers that she had been taken to the National Mental Hospital at Angoda
where she was warded.
From the diagnosis sheet of the doctor, it was said
that according to his observations there was no nature or sign of mental
disturbance in the lady.
A doctor in
Colombo later confirmed that Katalin had a serious spinal complaint which
required urgent medical attention. |
We both share the same
razor
Accident revealed Priyangika’s real sex
(Daily Mirror
13-1-2003)
The Kurunegala police and
the Military police have initiated inquiries in connection with an incident in
which a person who claimed to be a soldier and lived a
married life with another soldier pretending to be a female.
This incident was disclosed when the
"young woman" who was admittd to Kuruneglaa (sic)
hospital was undergoing treatment. "She was admitted to hospital with a
fractured ankle caused when the trishaow (sic) in
which she was travelling collided with a motor car at Malkaduwawa, Kurunegala
on Friday (10).
While she was
undergoing a surgical operation doctors in the operation room had found that
"she" is a male. The doctors then informed the hospital police that the injured
patient was a man. The "young woman" who is fair in complexion had applied
lipstick and worn a brassiere. "She" had an identity card indicating that she
was a female army soldier. "Her" name was given as Priyangika Menike. Police
suspect that the ID is a forged one and that that had been used to conceal her
sex.
Priyagika's real name is M A
Karunaratne. He is a resident of Polonnaruwa. Kurunegala police are making
inquiries to ascertain whether he was really in the army. Karunaratne who
disguised himself as "Priyangika" had married another soldier at Uhumiya
Kiralabokka a year ago. Priyangika who lived for some time in the husband's
house had left his house some time back. When the parents
of the husband came to know the accident of the daugher-in-law they had come to
hospital with female clothes. She had travelled in the trishow
(sic) alone.
The soldier who married Priyangika has still not been LOCATED.
Inquiries are being made to ascertain whether he is attached to a camp in
Anuradhapura. |
Kiwi birds for
sale
Some immigration scam brides 'unaware'
they were being used
13 January
2003 (n.z.p.a)
Some of the New Zealand
brides caught up in a marriage-for-residency racket exposed in a newspaper
report this weekend may be unaware they are being used. A South Auckland woman
said she married a Sri Lankan man for love, but discovered he was part of a
scam and planned to leave her as soon as his New Zealand residency came
through. The incident suggested that participants in the scam have tricked some
of the brides to give the marriages a greater chance of appearing genuine to
immigration authorities.
Full
story  |
Great Headlines No 1
'Innocent persons not found guilty' -Government Analyst
by Shanika Sriyananda Liyanage (Sunday
Observer 12-1-2003)
K. Sivaraja,
Government Analyst, referring to our article 'Forensic Blunders' which appeared
in last week's Sunday Observer said that no innocent person has been found
guilty of rape and murder. |
If they have no bread throw them
McMalupaan!
Government MPs want full investigation into bread-throwing
incident [ColomboPage News Desk, Sri Lanka] Jan 11, Colombo: A point of
order has been raised relating to the hurling of a loaf of bread by the
opposition at Minister Ravi Karunanayake in parliament. The incident took place
as the House was debating a draft bill on the setting up of a Consumer
Authority. |
|
SCN Srilanka Crazy News Vol 43
We weed out the serious news!