SCN SCN Srilanka Crazy News Vol 46 We weed out the serious news! INDEX
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Naughty Lanka Doc Gropes Kiwi Birds!
Doctor blames culture shock for his sex offences (New Zealand Herald 28.09.2004)
A former Greymouth doctor who indecently assaulted three women has been censured by the Medical Practitioners' Disciplinary Tribunal.
Nayana Prasanna Karunasekera, 38, a Sri Lankan, was sentenced to 12 months supervision after he was found guilty last year of indecently assaulting three women in Queenstown.
While on holiday with his family at the end of 2002, Karunasekera pushed two shop assistants' hands down to touch the groin area of his trousers, after first offering them a medical examination of their hands.
In the third case he touched a shop assistant's breasts.
Dry Fish Not Posh Enough For Gods
Death in a dried fish cauldron by Malmi Sellahannadi (Daily News 28-9-04)
A 36-year-old man who accidentally fell into a huge cauldron of dried-fish curry prepared for an alms giving ceremony at a Devalaya in Ihala Bomiriya Kaduwela died at the Colombo National Hospital on Thursday.
Dog Eats Dog!
Cop shoots cop in police station
by Sarath Malalasekera (Daily News 20-9-2004)
The officer-in-charge of the Pamunugama Police Station Sub Inspector R.S.M. Rodrigo was shot dead inside the police station by a Police constable of the same police station yesterday afternoon. Investigations conducted by Negombo Senior SP Jagath Keenawinna revealed that Constable Senaratne had shot the OIC in connection with an argument over leave application.
Policeman shoots policeman in Sri Lanka
If you go down into the woods today you're in for a big surprise!
Sri Lanka handball team vanishes!
(BBC 15-09-2004) LINK German authorities say they are puzzled by the disappearance of the entire national handball team from Sri Lanka.

German Sports Exchange Programme organiser, Dietmer Doering, said: "We initially thought the team had got lost in nearby woods while jogging." But he said a note had been found saying the 23-strong team had gone to France. "We now know they crossed into Italy,"
Mr Doering said. "They even left their dirty laundry," he added.
Up skirt!
Coconut husker rips mini skirts (Daily Mirror 11-09-2004)
A coconut husker with a penchant for ripping mini skirts of teenage school girls with a razor blade, was arrested yesterday while ripping the skirt of a school girl returning from a tuition class in the Kuliyapitiya town, police said.
"Oh Shit!" said the Magistrate!
Wrath of excreta
(Daily Mirror 20-8-2004) Hambantota Magistrate A.V. Suraweera was stunned yesterday when a suspect threw a bag containing faecal matter at him in courts, police said.
The Road To Nirvana Is....
Bogus monk who exploited female children arrested
by Nadira Gunatilleke (Daily News 15-7-2004) The Special Police Unit of the National Child Protection Authority arrested a person who posed as a Buddhist monk and exploited female children in the Welikanda area, an NCPA spokesman said.
He said that the suspect has invited female children for meditation classes and touched their bodies asking them to think (meditate) that their bodies do not exist.
The children had escaped and run away. Welikanda police produced the suspect before Polonnaruwa District Judge Ms. Sivapatha Sundaram and he was released on bail. The female children were examined by the Polonnaruwa Judicial Medical Officer. Police investigations continue.
Wasps Offered Bribes!
Sri Lanka appeals to gods to calm wasps at heritage site
AFP Monday May 3, 9:09 PM Sri Lankan authorities sought divine intervention to calm a colony of venomous wasps who stung more than 200 tourists at the fifth-century rock fortress of Sigiriya, a World Heritage Site.
Cultural ministry officials said Monday that they offered alms and cash to gods at the foot of the 180-metre (600-foot) fortress, 160 kilometres (100 miles) north of Colombo. "We had a ritual this morning to appease the gods and exorcise any evil spirits and calm the wasps," an official at Sigiriya said by telephone. "But the rock will remain closed until further notice."
The official said initial investigations showed that students had thrown stones and disturbed the colony of wasps nesting at the main steps to the fortress on Saturday.
More than 200 tourists, including foreigners, were discharged from hospital at the weekend after treatment, officials said. Army troops were called in Saturday to smoke out the wasps and rescue dozens of visitors who were marooned on top of the rock.
However, officials have ruled out using chemicals fearing damaging the 1,500-year-old frescoes of bare-chested women known as the Sigiriya maidens. Hundreds of thousands of tourists come to see the frescoes and are advised to maintain silence so as not to upset the wasps. Officials said they were contemplating providing plastic covers for visitors as an extra precaution.
Forget The Viagra, Pass the Kassippu!
Liquor marketed as aphrodisiacs
Crime Sunday by JAYAMPATHY JAYASINGHE (Sunday Observer 2-5-2004) Unlawfully Distilled Spirits (UDS), commonly known as Kassippu has been a flourishing business for illicit liquor manufacturers, who have made a fortune from it over the years. Despite heavy, penalties imposed by courts, illicit liquor manufacturers Kassippu Mudalalis have continued to thrive due to the profitability of the business.
Relentless action by the Central Vice Squad, Panadura to rid the area of the illicit liquor menace during the past few years kept the Kassipu Mudalalis at bay. However, they used ingenuity to sell their stuff under various ruses. The most common method was to sell their stuff under well-known brand names with labelling and bottling being done in secret.
Another method of disposing the illicit stuff was to sell it to bars and restaurants in big cities. The same stuff was sold to unsuspecting customers as genuine liquor. Although many restaurants and bars in the Colombo City and suburbs have been periodically raided by Police and Excise Department officials, the racket goes on unabated. The other reason for the illicit liquor industry to thrive was due to the pervasiveness and ruthlessness of the underworld gangs.
The latest ploy they have adopted is to dispose large quantities of illicitly manufactured liquor in the open market by bottling them under different brands of aphrodisiacs. Colouring is added to the brew to deceive the public. Last week, a team from the Ja-Ela Excise Station, headed by the OIC Excise, Inspector R.M. Ratnayake with Inspector Prasanna and Dissanayake and others raided an illicit liquor den at Alawathupitiya in the Ja-Ela area where they found three men distilling the deadly brew. While searching the premises for other clues, the Excise men also found 3780 bottles of an aphrodisiac named "Maathroo-Sanjeevani". The stuff was found in 550 millilitre bottles packed inside 107 cardboard boxes. The total quantity of aphrodisiac found in the bottles was around 1310 litres and 750 millilitres.
The main suspect had admitted that he was a teledrama actor by profession and was engaged in the manufacture of aphrodisiacs to supplement his income. Maathroo-Sanjeevani bottles bear attractive labels that suggest the product has curative powers for many sexual disorders and dysfunctions. A brownish colouring is added to make the brew look like a genuine decoction. Maathroo-Sanjeevani is distributed in far away places like Anuradhapura and Polonnaruwa and is freely available in boutiques. The retail price of a bottle is Rs. 80. (abridged)
A couple of years ago, the Police Central Vice Squad at Panadura seized 3700 bottles of moonshine sold as aphrodisiacs known as Muthrasanjeewani from boutiques and shops in Dambulla and Galewela areas. Two persons involved in the racket were taken into custody. "The strangest thing was that people never realised the decoction contained illicit liquor with colouring" police said.
Any News Of The Piano?
Piano shooter in court

By Kurulu Kariyakarawana (Daily Mirror 8-4-2004)
The businessman who shot at the grand piano at Hotel Hilton recently is to be produced before Fort Magistrate today as he had failed to come to a settlement with the hotel management. The businessman who surrendered to Fort police on Sunday, several days after the incident had given a statement that he was to come to a settlement with the hotel without going to courts. The damage done to the grand piano was estimated to be over Rs.680,000. The police sources said the businessman had not paid for the damage yet. OIC Fort Jayantha Seneviratne told the Daily Mirror the suspect had used his licensed pistol to shoot at the piano. (See original story below)
Demand For Dead Men!
Four women claim a dead body (Daily Mirror 12-4-2004)
A rare incident was reported from the Ragama Teaching Hospital on Saturday where four women struggled to release (sic! -Ed) the body of a 47-year-old man claiming that the deceased was their husband.
The victim was an alcoholic and was admitted due to a related ailment few days ago. He died on Saturday afternoon. Hearing of the death, four women had rushed to the hospital claiming the victim as their husband. A near clash was averted by the hospital staff and the incident was reported to Ragama police.
The four women were taken to Ragama police and found that the victim had been having affairs with each woman where he had been married and had a 20-year-old daughter. Police had however refused to hand over the body to all four women (Cut up the body?- Ed). Later an Attorney appeared at the scene on behalf of the legally married woman and had the body released after discussing with the hospital authorities.
He Lost His Magic!
Magical power couldn't hide him forever

By Susitha R. Fernando (Daily Mirror 6-4-2004, abridged)

A sorcerer who had evaded trial in a cheating case for ten years allegedly with the support of influential persons was sentenced to seven years RI by Colombo High Court in absentia.
The accused Jaliya Kumara was found guilty of cheating a person Rs. 400,000 and was sentenced to rigorous imprisonment two weeks ago. The accused who was indicted in 1994 was absconding and the court had issued an open warrant to arrest and produce the man. Recently he was arrested in Thalawathugoda where he was residing and produced before court.
The accused informed court that there were death threats to his life and in order to escape from those threats he had to hide. The accused also told the court that he was the father of fourteen children and thirteen of them were still studying.
The chief investigating officer, IP Ampawila who arrested the accused informed the court that the accused, a sorcerer had evaded police on several occasions. This was done with the help of a number of VIPs including high security officials who were his clients. The accused who did not deny the allegation stated that he had resorted to this type of escape as he was not sure about whether the police officers were genuine. .........
Tigers Offer Free Cremations!?
Body of Sri Lankan election candidate exhumed, set on fire

Associated Press, Mon April 5, 2004 06:14 EDT . - - COLOMBO, Sri Lanka - (AP) Members of Sri Lanka - 's mainstream rebel movement exhumed and set fire to the body of a slain parliamentary candidate who had opposed the group, police and breakaway rebels said Monday. Sri Lanka - elected a new parliament on Friday. The rebels' proxy party the Tamil National Alliance emerged as the third-largest group. Sathiyamoorthy, also a member of the Tamil party, had sided with powerful renegade guerrilla commander Karuna, who took with him some 6,000 guerrillas from the 15,000-strong rebel army last month. Published: Mon Apr 5 07:37:40 EDT 2004
Sting In The Tail?
Train runs over rail driver
By Rebecca Fleming
(Daily Mirror 6-4-2004) The city coroner reserved for April 11 the verdict on an engine driver who was knocked down by a train at the Dematagoda railway yard yesterday Fifty-four-year old M.Varna Mailavapinui of Colombo 10 was knocked down at the Dematagoda train yard during the early hours of yesterday.
A companion of the victim, 54-year-old D.A Sugathadasa giving evidence before the City Coroner Edward Ahangama said that he and the victim had been working together for 10 years. From April 01 both of them had worked continuously till April 4. On April 3 both of them had relaxed in one of the engines in the train yard. While relaxing they had fallen asleep and had woken up around 5.30 am. Varna had got off from the engine and had gone to wash himself. 15 minutes later H.A. Nandasena had come and informed him that Varna had been knocked down by a train. He had seen the victim lying on the railway track at about 6.30 am. He had informed the authorities.
Sugathadasa said that the victim hadn't any reason to go there. He further stated that the victim had been knocked down by the last compartment of the train.
According to Additional Medical Officer (AJMO) Dr. D.I.L Ratnayake the victim's death was due to neck and chest injuries caused by train. Dematagoda police led evidence.
Piano Shot Dead!
Businessman allegedly shoots at Hilton piano
By Kurulu Kariyakarawana (daily Mirror 1-4-2004)
A wealthy businessman allegedly ran amock at the Hotel Hilton yesterday evening firing at the grand piano exhibited at the hotel, police said.
They said the angry businessman had allegedly fired at the expensive piano as he and his model fiancée (sic -Ed) were prevented from playing it.
The businessman had come with his fiancée who had participated in a fashion show. The couple was returning after the show around 5.45 pm when the businessman was prevented from playing the piano by a security guard. The businessman had gone out side immediately, returned with a pistol and allegedly shot several times at the piano before leaving the hotel.
Fort ASP Champika Siriwardene said the suspect had fled though the police arrived at the hotel within three minutes. A special team has been deployed to nab the suspect.
Australia To Take On Bikkhus!
Bhikkhus must now take to cricket
Letters to the Editor (Source: Buddhists in this country must be overjoyed at the prospect of bhikkhus in parliament. Their very presence, it is hoped, would result in dishonest, badly behaved MPs feeling ashamed. No longer will we hear unparliamentary language, and corruption, let us also hope, will be a thing of the past. As far as politics is concerned, shouldn’t we think that we are in for a new era where higher standards will prevail. It is my humble submission that we should not restrict this revolution to politics.
One area of activity in this country that has a national dimension is cricket. It is undeniable that our standing in the cricket world has declined. The standard of our umpiring has come in for criticism from time to time. Would it not be a great improvement of we had bhikkhus doing the umpiring? They would be completely impartial and totally above corruption. If other religions protest on the grounds of discrimination, there is no reason why a Christian clergyman should not officiate at the other end. The third umpire could be a Hindu priest and if the Muslims insist, the referee could be a mullah.
If my suggestion meets with the approval of the authorities I would be glad to set the ball rolling by donating saffron coloured longs for the first appointee (it would be unreasonable to expect him to be moving about in robes on a cricket field). All cricket lovers who are good Buddhists will, I am sure welcome this suggestion!
Jailbirds Contest Election!
Sri Lankan monks given suspended jail terms for breaking election laws
Lankapress COLOMBO, March.22 2004(AFP) : Two Buddhist monks were fined and given suspended jail terms for putting up posters backing an all-clergy party contesting next month's parliamentary elections, police said Monday.

The monks were arrested in Wattegama town in central Sri Lanka last week for trying to display posters of their National Heritage Party in violation of election laws, police said. The two were fined 500 rupees (11 US dollars) each and given one-month jail terms suspended for seven years, police said.
Sledgehammer To Crack Nut?
Temple destroyed by Kavin Welamitiyawa (Daily News 13-2-2004)
The Sri Vijayasramaya temple of Bandaranaikepura, Rajagiriya was bulldozed and razed to the ground by a group of persons, Thursday night bringing the entire neighbourhood to a state of shock and alarm.
The Incumbent Priest threatened by intruders fled the premises in fear and was reported missing. A valuable Buddha Statue that belonged to the temple was alleged to have been taken away by the attackers.
Chop Chop at Funny Farm!
Karate champ runs amok, kills woman by Asanga Warnakulasuriya (Daily News 12-3-2004) A black belt karate champion Gayan Sanjeewa Hapuarachchi who represented Sri Lanka in the South Asian games was alleged to have gone berserk and chopped a 37-year-old mother of two to death, Divulapitiya Police said yesterday.
Villagers and Police stood petrified while watching the suspect displaying a wide array of karate chop, not allowing anyone to come close to him. Ultimately the Police had to fire several shots at his foot to overpower him. He was then taken into custody, OIC Crimes S.P.K. Jayasuriya told the Daily News yesterday.
Police said that the suspect had entered the deceased's house around 5.00 a.m. while the husband was away. According to Police, the 29-year-old youth who had returned home after receiving treatment at Angoda mental hospital several weeks ago was running a farm before his conditioned worsened. It is said that suspect had not taken the prescribed medicine.
The suspect, produced before the Negombo Magistrate, was remanded pending the submission of a medical certificate.
Cops Shoot For Pot and Miss!
Dog bites cop, bullet kills woman by Senarath Pushpananda (Daily News 11-3-2004)
A woman was killed and three others critically injured when they were reportedly hit by stray bullets police fired at a dog attacking two police officers on duty at Beragala in Haputale. The three injured persons are now under treatment at the Diyatalawa Hospital. The angry crowds provoked by the incident blocked the Haputale- Beragala road burning tyres protesting against the police action causing a temporary stoppage of vehicular traffic. The Police used tear to disperse the unruly crowds who gathered in front of the police station hurling stones at the police. Two policemen and three civilians were injured in the incident, police said. (Any news of the dog? - Ed)

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